Subject: Fathers Loving Truth
From: <[email-masked]>
To: <[email-masked]>
Date: Sun, 15 Jan 2006 09:21:04 +1100

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Issue 171 - 5th November 2005 	Go to our website Here
<http://www.fathersonline.org/> 	 
 
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*	Welcome! Warwick
*	Grandads
*	Laughter
*	Single Dads
*	Special Feature
*	Thought of the Week
*	Battle for Life
*	News & Info
*	Dad's Prayer
*	About Us

Welcome! Warwick

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Man%20and%20boy%
20fishing2.jpg> We were interrupted last week by
the Chronicles of Narnia, and 'having 
fun with your family' which is actually
a great interruption, but I would now like
to share my Seven Secrets for Success. 
These seven secrets line up with the goal 
setting assignment that we discussed for
the New Year. Remember, if you aim for
nothing you are guaranteed to hit it. 
If you don't know where you are going 
you are probably on the road to nowhere. 

 At the beginning of the year I suggested that you establish some life
 goals for you and your family and write them  down on a piece of paper.
 It's important to write these goals down so you can see how you are
going. 
 
Life Goals 
1) Personal or Self Goals 
2) Family and Relationship Goals 
3) Self-Development, Learning and Attitude Goals 
4) Health and Fitness goals 
5) Giving Goals 
6) Work and Financial Goals 
7) Spiritual Goals 
 
You might well ask what this has to do with becoming a great 
father and having a successful family life. My answer is this. 
'If the saw is not sharp, it will not cut.' You must first become
the change you seek. You are the leader in your family. The best 
way to lead is by example. Being a successful father has to be 
seen in the context of the bigger picture of your family, your 
relationships, your work, your health and your self development
as a man and a spiritual being. Love is the key and you must 
apply that love to the things that really matter. The Seven 
Secrets for Success could be better called the Seven Love 
Secrets for Life. I will share the first love secret with 
you today. 

First Love Secret 
 
Love Truth and Love Yourself ' at the same time. Jesus said, 'Love your 
neighbour as yourself'. If you hate yourself you will secretly hate your
neighbour. You will find that most success/motivational speakers 
and writers will always list loving yourself as a fundamental for
success
but very few will also include loving truth on the same level. The 
reason this must be done is simple. If you don't you are bound to fail. 
Our egos are very deceitful and that's where we get into trouble.
We start to believe our own press. We human's are very resourceful 
' we manufacture our own lies about ourselves and then we invent 
logical arguments as to why we should believe our own lies. 
Shakespeare said, 'To thine own self be true and as night follows 
day you cannot be false to any man. Doris Mortman said, 
'Until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content 
with what you have. 'Proverbs says, 'Buy the truth and do not sell 
it.' 
 
Popular folklore has a similar saying that well articulates 
this, 'Truth/honesty is the best policy.'Elbert Hubbard said,
'Live truth instead of professing it.' In Psalms it says, 'God 
desires truth in our inward parts.' Jesus said, 'You shall know
the truth and the truth will set you free.' It is only when you 
know the truth that you can be truly free in yourself. You no 
longer have to please anybody, even yourself, because if 
you please the truth you will do yourself the biggest favour and
everyone else at the same time. Loving truth will provide you 
with the ultimate win-win situation. The alternatives are win/lose
or lose/win. Both are unthinkable to the law of love because 
love puts a priority on what is best for everyone which is really a
father's job. 
 
Lovework 
 
Rudyard Kipling's poem 'If ' is a classic poem about the
journey to manhood. To be a father you must first 
become a man. To be a man you must be initiated by 
the pain of life and pass the test of truth. This test of 
truth occurs throughout the whole process 
of life. For men, this is the greatest challenge. 
 
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster 
And treat those two imposters just the same. . . 
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, 
And -- which is more -- you'll be a Man, my son! 
 
The poem 'if 'can be found in the Special Feature section
 of this newsletter. Be inspired to become a lover of truth. 
Loving yourself should come pretty easily after 
that. 
 
Yours for loving truth 
Warwick Marsh 
 
Ps We are excited to report that we have received a 
number of offers to help redesign and keep our website updated. 
The Fatherhood Foundation would like to build the best 
fatherhood/family friendly website in the world as a resource 
to Aussie fathers and our growing international readership. 
There is no reason that fathersonline could not be the world's 
number one resource for fathers. If you would like to help us 
achieve this goal by making your skills or finance available, 
please contact us at [email-masked]
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hersonline.org>  or call our office 
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______________________________________________________

Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 30 years. He is 
the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in 
age from 25 years to 13 years.  Warwick is a musician, 
songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he 
can still laugh at himself.

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Grandads

 
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You shall know the truth 
and the truth will set you free 
 
Jesus 

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Laughter

 
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Weary of constantly picking clothes up from the floor of her son's room,
a mother finally laid down the law. Each item of clothing she had to
pick up would cost her son 25 cents. 

By the end of the week, he owed her $1.50. She received the money
promptly, along with a 50-cent tip and a note that read: 

"Thanks, Mom. Keep up the good work!" 

_________________________________________________________

Even though he could not tell time, my three-year-old grandson was
wearing a watch when I visited. Later, when I was putting on my coat to
leave, I asked him what time it was. He looked at his watch blankly,
then brightened. "It's time for you to go," he answered triumphantly. 

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Single Dads

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Nobody Understands 
By Robert Martin 
 
Many years ago, I recall an occasion when I walked into a 
bar and sat beside an older man. After a hello and a brief 
conversation about the weather, he said words to the 
effect that he had been to the Family Court and that he 
no longer sees his children. I had never been to any Court
 and assumed that social justice would always be served. 
 
Without thinking too much about his impromptu statement, 
I responded by saying "Well you must have done something wrong". 
He then went silent and stared at one place on a distant wall 
for some time. I wondered what he may have been thinking. 
I was surprised that he did not respond at all. I expected that 
we would correct me if I was wrong or perhaps change the 
subject if he was uncomfortable with his past actions. My life 
went on and I never thought about this occasion for quite some time. 
 
Later in life, after I had become a father, I also went to the 
Family Court as my ex would not allow me to see the children. 
It seemed as though I was being processed by a system that 
looks for every weakness a parent may have. Even where
weaknesses did not exist it was implied or in some instances
fabricated. I never heard one positive comment about myself
or my relationship with the children. 
 
After not seeing the children for more than one year on the third
occasion, I had become deeply depressed. My life consisted of
Court proceedings, solicitors,appointments and assessments
of my parenting abilities. 
 
No one seemed to care. 
 
Never was there an assumption that I may be an average 
and decent person. 
 
My thoughts were continually with the children. 
 
My life began to crumble when I had to deal with more and 
more government departments, all of which seemed to hold 
no value on fatherhood. 
 
People close to me, including family members often told me 
what I should do. I understood this to mean that I was 
inadequate at making decisions myself. 
 
I tried to explain, but few would listen, and those who did listen
were not able to believe me as they believed that the Courts 
would always serve social justice. 
 
No one could work out what was wrong with me that caused
me to fail to achieve for the children's sake. The reality was 
that nothing was wrong with me at all, but at the time 
I started to doubt myself. I had come to the conclusion that no
one understood what was happening and when friends and family
offered suggestions, I would simply not respond. 
I had become like the man that I had met in the bar many 
years earlier. 
 
I had lost my employment. 
 
Most of the assets that I had were taken. 
 
The rest were sold to keep paying the way through the Courts. 
 
Assets, financial security, income, stability, social life, friends, 
respect of family - almost all of the things that reflected my 
self-worth were gone. My depression spiralled down though 
intense emotional pain, then wanting to end the intense emotional 
pain, and then finally, I felt that I needed to end the pain altogether.
At this point I realised that I was not going to get though this 
without some help. I went to see a doctor and he seemed to 
understand. He had seen many others in my situation. He said 
that I should have seen him years earlier. In all the things that 
had been said, these words were the truest of them all. 
 
I would like to say that all was well after this point, but it wasn't
quite. Proceedings went on for a while longer, but at least I could 
now focus on what was going on, and I felt more in control of 
myself and my emotions. 
 
Time went on and the tangled web was untangled. Now the children
live with me and we have new challenges. I confidently tackle 
these challenges, knowing that my inner strength and love for the 
children is a driving force that has met challenges that are 
beyond the imagination of many. 
 
Watching them grow and seeing their happiness has made it all worth 
while. I now realise that most of the things that I once considered
important are of little value to the children. 
 
Seeing them make new friends, tackle new tasks, learn new 
things - these come from the time we play together, watching 
movies and just generally being there for them. At night I tell 
them that I love them for ever and ever and ever. I hope that 
when they 
are adults, they will still allow me help them in their more difficult 
times. 
 
Now when I meet someone that is experiencing difficulties like 
I have, I always talk for a while and let them know "Somebody
Understands". 
______________________________________________________________________
Robert Martin is a single father of a boy and girl aged 10 and 11 
years old.  He lives in Nth Queensland. We welcome him to the 
Single Dads editorial team. Tony Miller is working on a book so he 
will be absent from our newsletter for a month or so.

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Special Feature

 

If 

Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936) 
 
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If you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; 
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, 
But make allowance for their doubting too; 
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, 
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies, 
Or being hated, don't give way to hating, 
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise: 

If you can dream -- and not make dreams your master; 
If you can think -- and not make thoughts your aim; 
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster 
And treat those two imposters just the same; 
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken 
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, 
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, 
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools; 

If you can make one heap of all your winnings 
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, 
And lose, and start again at your beginnings 
And never breathe a word about your loss; 
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew 
To serve your turn long after they are gone, 
And so hold on when there is nothing in you 
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!" 

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, 
Or walk with kings -- nor lose the common touch, 
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, 
If all men count with you, but none too much; 
If you can fill the unforgiving minute 
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -- 
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, 
And -- which is more -- you'll be a Man, my son! 

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Thought of the Week

 
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pg> 
It is the calling of great men, 
not so much to preach new truths, 
as to rescue from oblivion 
those old truths 
which is our wisdom to remember 
and our weakness to forget. 
 
Sydney Smith (1771-1845) 

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Battle for Life

 
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URGENT ACTION REQUIRED
MAKE A STAND IN THE BATTLE FOR HUMAN LIFE
 
Dear Friend
 
In July 1942, a small group of Australian soldiers recaptured the
village of Kokoda in the rugged hills of Papua New Guinea from the
seemingly invincible Japanese Army.  In the subsequent battles they were
outnumbered 20:1 and came under withering fire from a well armed, well
supplied and well trained foe, but they stood fast.  Many Aussies died
as they defended Kokoda at the cost of their own blood from the invading
forces.  These enemy forces were hell bent on the destruction and
domination of Australia.  The Australian soldiers were  very young (
average age 18YRS), poorly trained, ill-equipped and outgunned by the
superior battle hardened Japanese Army.  They suffered incredible losses
but having done all they stood and fought until more forces arrived to
join them.  The story of the 39th Battalion's stand against the Japanese
Army is regarded as the turning point in the battle for Australia. Up
until this time the Japanese army had never been defeated. It could be
argued that a few hundred brave Aussie soldiers saved Australia from
almost certain invasion and turned the course of the second World War.
 
Today we have a similar battle for the lives of the children of
Australia.  The battle to stop the legalising of the RU486 Abortion Pill
is the first battle that must be fought as well as the battle against
life in the guise of the Lockhart enquiry recommendations.  You say to
yourself, "I am only one person.  What can I do?"
 
You can send an email you can ring or write a letter to your local
Senator or Federal Parliamentary member for your area and ask him or her
to express your wishes in how they use their vote.  They are your
representatives. How will they know how to represent you in Federal
Parliament unless you tell them. Remember they need your vote to stay in
parliament.  If the Aussies who fought for our nation thought, "I am
only one soldier, what can I do against the overwhelming odds?"
Australia might not be a free country today, and many more would have
died, but thank God the Aussie soldiers made a stand against a deadly
invading army. We are alive today because of their sacrifice.
 
The opportunity to lodge your letter against the further legalising of
the RU486 dangerous abortion pill which has killed over ten women and
millions of babies internationally finishes on the close of business,
Monday 16th January 2006.  To make a stand in the battle for life, send
an email as short or long as you like to the Senate Community Affairs
Committee
[email-masked]
<mailto:[email-masked]>  detailing your reason /
reasons why the Therapeutic Goods Administration (TGA) should not make
decisions on a drug that's main purpose is to kill unborn Australian
children.  Tell them that RU486 has killed many mothers as well.  Tell
them that decisions on such drugs should be reserved for our
parliamentary leaders and not bureaucrats in the TGA. Make sure you give
your name and residential address at the end of your email / letter.
 
Every indication is that we could well lose this battle against the
introduction of this deadly drug.  The situation is very similar to the
one faced by those young Aussie soldiers on the Kokoda Trail. Thank God
they made a stand for life in 1942.  Thank God they fought an impossible
battle and won against overwhelming odds.  In the years to come many
children will be born who will grow up and thank God that you and I made
a stand in 2006 for life and stood against the continuing escalation of
abortion in Australia in the form of the RU486 abortion pill.
 
We enclose as attachments information that will help you make a stand in
the battle for the children of Australia. Feel free to use these
attachments but remember that you must use your own words.  Also make
sure that you include all your contact and address details.
 
For further reference: www.rtlaust.com <http://www.rtlaust.com/> 
 
Warwick & Alison Marsh
Fatherhood Foundation / Australian Heart Ministries
PO Box 440
Wollongong  NSW
02 4272 6677
[email-masked] <mailto:[email-masked]> 
www.fathersonline.org <http://www.fathersonline.org/>             

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News & Info

 

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Working with Men Training Course at Burnside

See link for details:

http://www.burnside.org.au/content/2006%20Working%20with%20Men%20Trainin
g%20Course%2Edoc
<http://www.burnside.org.au/content/2006%20Working%20with%20Men%20Traini
ng%20Course%2Edoc> 

____________________________________________

Letters

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

Hi, I'm not sure if this foundation will be able to help me but I pray
that you can. I'm 16 and I haven't known my father and he doesn't know
about me either... I am now at the age where I want him to at least be
aware that he has a daughter. I live in Victoria. I have tried and tried
to find him through different sources, but have never achieved this
goal. I then approached different organizations asking for help but I
was turned away from most, because I was not adopted, and most others
said they would look and get back to me but never did, and others didn't
know what to do. I am nearly out of hope, I have found and address in
the white pages which just might be him but the phone number is know
longer connected, yet again another dead end. This is my last option; I
have not enough money to pay a private investigator or to pay anyone to
help. I'm only asking you for some options some ideas just some kind of
help that no one else wants to give. Please contact me with any advice
you may have, I would be ever so grateful....

Thanking you

CB

_________________________________________________________

Dear Fatherhood Foundation
 
Mothers do not have to stampede off to an abortion clinic or take an
Abortion Pill these days. DNA Parentage Testing enables a mother to have
a Test carried out in the very early stages of pregnancy to give her
information so she can make in informed decision as to who the Father of
her foetus is. In the situation where the DNA Parentage Test result
clearly indicates the fetus is that of her husband she can make a clear
decision not just go and have an abortion but to carry on with the
pregnancy as the foetus belongs to her husband and herself.

In the situation where the Test proves that the foetus is not that of
her husbands she may then decide to have an abortion, however before she
does this she should be made aware that according to the Australian
Sensis just under 90% of men accept this position and happily stays on
as "The Chosen Father" being the one who stays on to care and raise the
child very willingly for once people know the truth they normally make
informed decisions that are for the positive when it comes to dealing
with babies and children's welfare and wellbeing.

If this new gentle DNA Test can save one abortion it is well worth the
world being aware of its availability.

For further information please feel welcome to contact me.
Les Gray
0409 988 244
Email: [email-masked] 
Lone Fathers WA
_________________________________________________________________

Action to Save Women and Children

 

AUSTRALIANS AGAINST RU486
NATIONAL DAY OF ACTION

 
Image<https://promo-manager.server-secure.com/users/WC-464918/images/316
71.jpg> 	
Sunday January 29 <mailto:[email-masked]> 	
Help us keep the ban on RU486

Sunday 29th January will be the National Day of Action Against RU486, a
drug commonly known as the 'abortion pill'. 

Please help us to ensure that the ban remains on this deadly drug by
activating your community group, church or parish to be part of this
important National Day of Action.  Politicians opposed to the abortion
drug are urging all of us to write letters to parliament voicing
opposition to RU486:

"The debate on RU486 is a watershed issue for Australia.

Will we accept a drug which is designed to kill unborn children, and is
also killing and harming women?

Even if you have never written to your Senators before, you need to
write to them on RU486 to keep this dangerous drug out of Australia."
Senator Ron Boswell, National Party Leader in the Senate

By responding to this email alert and supporting the campaign of
Australians Against RU486, you will join a broad coalition of concerned
individuals and orgnisations who are working to defeat the RU486
legislation in Parliament.

The abortion pill Bill has been introduced in the Senate, so our special
focus for the National Day of Action will be on writing and signing
letters to Senators.  Senator Steve Fielding has reiterated the
importance of doing just this, writing to Senators: 

"Write to your state's Senators and tell them to vote against the RU 486
Bill to stop even more abortions and to show genuine concern for women."
Contact AARU486 for an Information Pack	
To obtain a National Day of Action Information Pack, or for further
inquiries, contact the National Office of Australians Against RU486 by
email, phone or mail (details below).  Make sure you give us your
mailing address and a contact name, and advise us how many letters your
church/group may be able to sign.

Email us:  [email-masked] <mailto:[email-masked]> 

Phone the National Office:  (02) 9357 1684

National Office
Australians Against RU486
225 Glenmore Road
Paddington NSW 3021

Ursula Stephens, Labor Senator for NSW and Shadow Parliamentary
Secretary for Science

""The sole purpose of the drug RU486 is to cause the death of an unborn
child. This makes it different to other drugs. It's importation and use
is
an ethical and moral issue that needs to be discussed and to remain a
responsibility of the Minister for Health, who can then be held
accountable."

Australians Against RU486 is a broad coalition of concerned groups and
individuals campaigning on medical, ethical, or moral grounds to keep
the ban on RU486.

AARU486 supports positive outcomes for Australian women and believes
that the advocates of RU486 are endangering the lives of Australian
women in the name of choice.

AARU486 is a trust established specifically and solely to campaign to
keep the ban on RU486.

It's Not Safe, It's Not Simple, It's Not Right
Oppose RU486

www.aaru486.org.au
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nk=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.aaru486.org.au%2F> 

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Dad's Prayer

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Dear God 
 
Teach me to be true! 
Let me be true to myself first 
'cos this is probably the hardest - 
then I could love myself honestly. 
 
Then I could probably love my wife 
because she is part of myself. 
You said the two will become one . 
 
If I could love my wife and myself 
Then I could love my children 
as they are part of both of us. 
 
If I could love my wife, myself and my children 
I could love everyone else . . . 
 
As I was saying , 
Help me to be true! 

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About Us

Mission Statement & Help Us!

 
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Mission Statement 

The Fatherhood Foundation is a charitable, non profit incorporated
association with a goal to inspire men to a greater level of excellence
as fathers, by encouraging and educating them, thereby renewing and
empowering families.

Click here for more information about us
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Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation believes that the key to life is giving.
That's why this newsletter is given freely without expectation.  Life is
also about relationships.  That's what being a good father is all about,
developing relationships with your loved ones.
 
If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation,
please mail your cheque or money order to:
Fatherhood Foundation
PO Box 440
WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

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