Subject: The Path Less Travelled
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Date: Sun, 19 Nov 2006 09:18:54 +1100

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Issue 221 - 13 th November, 2006 	Go to our website Here
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*	Hello Warwick
*	Grandads
*	Laughter
*	Single Dads 
*	All you need is Love
*	Thought of the Week
*	Special Feature
*	News & Info
*	Dad's Prayer
*	Help Us

Hello Warwick

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/path%20travelled
.jpg> 

On the final night of the 'Good to Great' Fatherhood Mentoring Course I
asked the men to tell me the role of a father.  The answers started
flying thick and fast: provider, protector, leader, servant, mentor,
friend, nurturer, lover, priest, encourager, teacher, example,
counsellor and entertainer. Being a singer I liked the idea of
entertainer.  Perhaps it appealed to my ever-present ego.

One of the guys yelled out, "Sacrifice," but I pointed out that this was
more a quality then a role.  "Perhaps," I said' "We should put
'sacrifice' in the middle of the pie chart as this is the core quality
needed for all other roles to succeed."  Everyone seemed to agree,
although none of us really liked the idea.

At the recent Hillsong Men's conference one of the speakers said that
there is a longing in men's hearts for greatness.  The problems begin
when we want to take the glory for the greatness for ourselves. The
challenge we face as men is that the path to greatness is littered with
sacrifice. Dr M Scott Peck sums it up well in his six million copy
bestseller, 'The Road Less Travelled'. So does my good friend Noel
Giblett in his new album, 'Welcome to Midlife'. In many ways 'Welcome to
Midlife' is a call to arms, or should I say a call to lay down our arms.
Musically it is rather like Jackson Brown talking with Joni Mitchell who
meets Leonard Cohen who is counselling Don Mclean who is struggling with
depression and drinking coffee with James Taylor who has been listening
to Neil Young.  The wistful melodies get into your heart and mind and
after a few listens it becomes like a pair of comfy slippers that are
always nice to put on after a hard day's work.

However the lyrics of 'Welcome to Midlife' are a tad discomforting. The
truth is never pleasant at the best of times. The very title, Welcome to
Midlife, could send any testosterone filled masculine soul into crisis.
There are no songs about what it feels like to own a new Harley Davidson
but plenty about the world at large for men, a man's internal world, the
high cost of love, the search for authentic self, spiritual realities
and the essence of life in the path littered with sacrifice as the road
less travelled.  Noel Giblett, being a true troubadour, knows that a
spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down and is not adverse to some
lighter observations on life, or the subtle use of humour.  The fact
that Noel Giblett is a practising psychotherapist and manager of
Lifeline in Perth WA has given him some deep insights into the human
condition and the many challenges men face in our highly matriarchal
society.  If you would like to enjoy some more of Noel's musical wisdom,
check out: www.noelgiblett.com.au <http://www.noelgiblett.com.au/>  

Sacrifice is one of the inescapable realities of life. For the male ego,
even the thought is repulsive. Mothers embrace sacrifice as a daily
necessity, but fathers sometimes tremble at the thought. Maybe that is
why the word 'mother' is the most popular word in the English language
but the word 'father' doesn't even make it into the top one hundred.
Don't forget that may be one reason you are reading this newsletter, so
that you can be assaulted by such brutal thoughts.  On second thoughts
maybe you should listen to some good music that contains the same
message.  After all a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.

Lovework

Great songwriters are generally great because they tell the truth, with
some notable exceptions. Music can be part of the healing process if we
let it. Why not put your slippers on, sit back in your comfy chair,
drink a coffee and enjoy some musical moments that will encourage you to
take the path less travelled.

Yours for the path less travelled

Warwick Marsh

PS Good news: Tony Miller's daughter is out of casualty and getting
better. Another piece of good news: Richard Rohr's tour across Australia
has been sold out and Rob Jones from MTM Australia is more than pleased.
Rohr is a world renowned author who specialises in men's spirituality
and men's rites of passage. For further information and resources visit:
www.mtmaustralia.org.au <http://www.mtmaustralia.org.au/>   or phone Rob
Jones on 07 3876 8710

___________________________________________________________

Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 30 years. He is 
the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from
25 years to 14 years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and
public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself.

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Grandads

 
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b.jpg> 

 

Life is difficult. 

This is a great truth,

one of the greatest truths.

Dr M Scott Peck

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Laughter

 

 
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A man and his wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there,
the wife got ill and died.
The undertaker told the husband, "We  can ship her home for $5,000 or
you can bury her her,in the holy land for $150.00.
The man thought about and said he wanted to ship her home.
The undertaker asked, " Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife
home when it could be wonderful to be buried here and you spend only
$150.00?"
The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three
days later rose from the dead. I can't take that risk."

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Single Dads 

 

SHANNON IS OFF LIFE SUPPORT
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pg> 

 

Day 31 - 14 November 2006 

The trackie was taken out today, the ventilator switched off, the
feeding tube removed and also the catheter. For the first time in 31
days Shannon was able to speak. We celebrated with me going up the shop
and bringing back chicken and chips and a bottle of coke. Well the
nurses did say she could eat whatever she wanted. She didn't eat much
but she enjoyed it and that's what she wanted. Nurse after nurse has
stopped in as they have walked past her bed surprised to see her without
the trackie and to say "is that what your voice sounds like?" I guess
that they are happy with themselves for another life saved and so they
should be. And I guess they see a big smile on my face as well. 

The first thing she said was "dad, I will be home for Christmas, you
just watch". I know she will. She said she had bought Rhys (her son) a
Christmas tree and she is determined to be home to set it up for him.
And I reckon she will too. 

You know, kids grow up so fast, before we know it they are adults with a
family of their own. I missed so much of my little girl's life that I am
so grateful of the time I now have with her. It's made me realise how
precious life is and how easy it can be taken away. How every moment
counts and how I need to eliminate the word 'LATER' when asked by my
children to spend time with them. It's made me realise that if you don't
act on life, life has a habit of acting on you. The greatest gift you
can give your kids is the gift of your time and in doing that you also
receive a gift back, their love and there is no greater gift than your
children's love. 

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I saw Kelly's parents running back and forth to the ward today. I didn't
interrupt them, I didn't want to impose on them. Our thoughts, prayers
and energy are enough to keep them and Kelly going. I see there are lots
of messages from all over the world coming in. Few things energise the
human spirit more than the desire to make a difference in the lives of
others. Keep it coming and we may just see Kelly home for Christmas,
wouldn't that be nice......... 

 LEAVE A MESSAGE FOR KELLY AND HER FAMILY (CLICK HERE)
<http://www.guestbookcentral.com/sign.cfm?guestbook=35194>  

Tony Miller 

Founder Dads in Distress

www.dadsindistress.asn.au <http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/>  

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All you need is Love

Why We're Thankful for Family
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For live links to full details and citations on each finding visit:

http://www.familyfacts.org/ 

1. Children raised in intact families have, on average, higher academic
achievement, better emotional health, and fewer behavioural problems.

2. Fathers of intact families spend, on average, more time with their
children.  

3. Teens who frequently have dinner with their families are at a lower
risk for substance abuse.

4. Adolescents from intact families are less likely to become sexually
active. 

5. Children raised in intact families by happily married parents tend to
be more religious in adulthood. 

6. Children raised in intact families are more likely to have stable and
healthy romantic relationships as adults.

7. Intact families are more likely to provide a safe home for children.

8. Married mothers tend to create a better home environment for their
infants. 

9. Married mothers are less likely to experience abuse and violence. 

10. Married fathers tend to have better psychological wellbeing.

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Thought of the Week

 

Pathways

By Noel Giblett
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jpg> 

Childhood is a world of wonder

Boyhood is a land of dreams

And no matter what the grown-ups try to tell you

Everything seems as it seems

 

Then somebody lifts the veil

Somebody parts the clouds

And the light shines onto everything

Dark and light, joy and pain

But it's alright

Everything belongs

Yes it's alright

Even the things that go wrong . . . 

From 'Welcome to Midlife' © 2006

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Special Feature

 

<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Boy%20on%20ball.
gif> Three Generations of Soccer - Three Generations of Dads

By Richard Hardy

I was born in England and was pretty much raised on soccer.  My dad was
a great goal keeper in his day and has a great passion for the game.  As
a child I can always remember his bent nose which was a 'war wound' from
his goal keeping days.  He had come out into the penalty box to
intercept a striker and received a boot in the nose, breaking it and
pushing the bridge to the right.  It gave him such a distinct look - I
always thought he was so strong and so brave to have made such a save.

Dad was involved - he took an interest in us and spent time with my
brothers (I'm the oldest of 4 boys) and I.  He coached my soccer team
from under 9's through to under 15's.  He took us from a rabble in the
under 9/division 9, through to being premiers and champions for under
11, 12, 13, 14 and eventually under 15/division 1.  It was a great
achievement for him and the team.  During this time it gave Dad and I a
common interest, something to talk about, something to be passionate
about.  I learnt so many valuable lessons from these years - how to be
gracious in defeat and humble in victory, how to be part of a team, to
never give up, that everything you do improves with practice and to
always give your best.  I didn't realise it at the time but through
Dad's example I was also learning how to be an involved dad.

I didn't play club soccer from 15 through to age 40 but then my son
turned 6 and decided he wanted to play, suddenly my interest in the game
was revived. My son now plays soccer for the very same club I did 25
years ago.  In his first season I remember standing around listening to
the club official discuss the arrangements for the season.  When he
asked for a volunteer to coach, I didn't even have to think about it -
my Dad did it for me and I was going to do it for my son and I stuck my
hand up "I'll do it," I said, hoping that I wasn't going to have any
competition for the position.

So on cold and crisp Saturday mornings in winter our family (including
my dad) travel to the same parks and watch my son play the same clubs I
did 25 years ago, except now I'm the coach. Through my son, Dad and I
are reliving all those seasons from many years ago and it has brought
back so many wonderful memories for us both.

So back in July with our love for the game reignited,
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/3%20generations.
jpg> three generations, grandfather, father and son settled down to
watch the World Cup at all hours of the morning. It was so inspiring to
see Australia matching it with world class teams and the three of us
shared the highs and the lows together. In one of our post-match
discussions my son out of the blue said; "Hey Dad, when I have a son and
I coach him soccer, it will be a dad (pointing at his grandfather),
coaching a dad (pointing at me), coaching a dad (pointing to himself)."
Dad and I smiled at each other, it seemed as though my son had already
gained a great sense of family.  In a simplistic way too he was starting
to understand how things can be passed from one generation to another.

You don't have to be a soccer coach to be involved with your children -
it's just one way of spending time with them.  The most important thing
is that you do spend time with them in a way that works for you. Maybe
it's backyard cricket, fishing, building a model aircraft, bike riding
or just reading a book together.  Regardless of how you choose to do it,
don't ever forget that the example you set, the lessons you teach and
the love you give as a dad today will have flow on effects for
generations to come. Is there any other work you do that comes close to
being as important?

Richard has been married for 12 years.  He has an 8 year old son and a 6
year old daughter.  Richard considers that his most important work is to
be the best dad he can be for his children.  He holds an associate
position at an international engineering consultancy where he works as a
civil engineer.

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News & Info

<http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20312376-421,00.html> 

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ding%20beard.jpg> 

 

 

Mens Health starts with Men

Support 

Prostrate Cancer Research and Male Depression  whcih are two of the
largest areas which threaten Mens health and survival

1.	Men are far less healthy than women. The average life expectancy
of males is 6 years less than females. 
2.	Every year in Australia 2,700 men die of prostate cancer - more
than the number of women who die from breast cancer. 
3.	Depression affects 1 in 6 men-Most don't seek help. Untreated
depression is a leading risk factor for suicide. Rates of suicide are
more than double the national road toll. 

Movember (the month formally known as November) is a charity event held
during November each year.

At the start of Movember guys register with a clean shaven face. The
Movember participants known as Mo Bros then have the remainder of the
month to grow and groom their moustache and along the way raise as much
money and awareness about male health issues as possible. 

Movember culminates at the end of the month at the gala parties. These
glamorous and groomed events will see Tom Selleck and David Boon
look-a-likes battle it out on the catwalk for their chance to take home
the prestigious Man of Movember title.

Whilst growing a mo' is left to the guys, Mo Sistas (ladies that support
their guys or love mo's!) form an important part of Movember with their
powerful feminine touch, by recruiting Mo Bros, helping to raise funds
and attending the highly anticipated Gala Parties. 

But its not all fun and games, so why the extreme behaviour?

Which ever way we look at it, men are far less healthy than women. The
average life expectancy for men is 6 years less than females.

The obvious question is why? 

Part of the answer is a lack of awareness about the very real health
issues faced by males. The good old "she'll be right" attitude and a
reluctance to see a doctor about an illness or for regular medical
checks also contributes to the problem. 

The aim of Movember is to change this attitude, make male health fun by
putting the MO back on the face of fashion and in the process raise some
serious funds for key male health issues. 

The key male health causes for Movember 2006 are: 

Prostate Cancer in partnership with the Prostate Cancer Foundation of
Australia ( www.prostate.org.au <http://www.prostate.org.au/>  ) because
every year in Australia 2,700 men die of prostate cancer - more than the
number of women who die from breast cancer. 

Male Depression in partnership with Beyond Blue  ( www.beyondblue.org.au
<http://www.beyondblue.org.au/>  ) because one in six men suffer from
depression at any given time but most don't seek help. 

Testicular Cancer because it's the second most common cancer in young
men aged 18 to 35.

We challenge you to change the face of men's health...  

www.movember.com.au <http://www.movember.com.au/>   

_________________________________________________________

DNA Test rights for Duped dads

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20764232-2,00.html

_________________________________________________________

Lack of Care is Harming Children

STRESSED parents who work long hours are putting their children at
increased risk of developing behavioural and mental problems later in
life, according to a new report.

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20780084-421,00.html

________________________________________________________

Fair Divorce Forum

Wests Illawarra Sports Club 7.00pm

Monday 20th of November

Unanderra, Wollongong NSW

 Speakers: 

J. Flanagon

 W. Marsh

 J. Dakers

 J. Ajaka (State Liberal Party)

 B. Williams

 T. Delbanco (Fair Divorce)

_________________________________________________________

Hey, Dad 

for fathers who have a child with a disability is a new addition to the
Hey Dad series of programs and is being developed in partnership between
Burnside, Centacare Broken Bay and The Spastic Centre and Lifestart with
funding from FaCSIA. 

6-7 February 2007  

7 Blackwood Place, Nth Parramatta

Ph: Andrew King on 0412 404 577

This training supports facilitators to target dads who have a child with
a disability, and provide Dads and Kids Playgroups and a Dads' Workshops
in either a three or five hour format. The training provides a suggested
program and resources for workers to facilitate both types of groups.
Themes explored in the Dads' Workshops include:

-  working in partnership with service providers   

- juggling the needs of your family, work and your own needs

- balancing the needs of other family members

- encouraging your child's emotional growth 

- focusing on the future

The program will help organisations that support families who have
children with disabilities, to involve fathers more easily into their
service. When both workshops are provided once per school term, the
manual provides enough resources to deliver an 18-month program.

________________________________________________________

Letters

Dear Fatherhood Foundation,

Saturday, November 18, 2006 5:30 PM

Subject: WRITE!

 'DNA testing and the public's opinion.' The Paternity Fraud Web site
web site will soon be updated so that you can post your opinion on the
site( if you so wish ). All opinions will be collected and submitted  to
the legislators.

 We plan for this to be up and operating by Monday 20th Nov 2006.

 Cheryl King

 www.PaternityFraudAustralia.com.au
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/bwEMailBlast/extranet/www.PaternityFraudAustra
lia.com.au> 

  

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fe%20(1)%20(2)_Page_1.jpg> 

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Welcome_to_Midli
fe%20(1)%20(2)_Page_2.jpg> 

 For One Night Only

Saturday 9th December, 2006 at KULCHA

1st Floor 13 South Terrace Fremantle. (above Dome Cafe')

Tickets at www.kulcha.com.au <http://www.kulcha.com.au/>  or phone 9336
4544 

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Dad's Prayer

 
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> Take This Body

By Noel Giblett

This is a moment 

Life many others

Just one step

On a very long walk

But I can feel

I'm about to stumble

Let myself down 

Despite all the talk

Wish I was different

Not like the others

Wish I could rise

Above this world

But I'm a man

Who needs some humbling

Needs reminding

What I am

Yes take this body

With all its longings

And take this soul

With all it holds

Teach me to wait

For my final freedom

At home in You

At home in me

This is a battle

Like any other

And I am a warrior in the field

Tho' I be wounded 

I won't surrender 

Tho' I be weakened 

I will not yield

Yes take this spirit

Tho' it be broken

And take this soul

With all it tries to hold

Teach me to walk

Whatever the weather

Whatever the weight

To Your door

Yes take this body

With all its longings

And take this soul

With all it tries to hold

Teach me to wait

For my final freedom

At home in You 

At home in me

'Welcome to Midlife' © 2006

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Help Us

Click here for more information about us
<http://www.ausheart.com.au/fathers/about/index.html>  

Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. 
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source
of harm. 

The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence  in
fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible,
involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their
children and their children's mother.

If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation
Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund 
(Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax
deductibility)
Westpac Branch Wollongong
BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558 

Or mail cheque and address details to:
PO Box 440
WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund  is a public fund listed on the
Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the
Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.

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