Subject: The Power of Words
From: <[email-masked]>
To: <[email-masked]>
Date: Sun, 1 Apr 2007 09:05:58 +1000

<http://emailblast.bosweb.com.au/bwEMailBlast/tracker/read.asp?ReadID=95
6899> 
Unable to read this email? Please click here
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/bwEMailBlast/view.asp?CampaignMediaID=1467&Con
tactID=90915&ContactEmail=[email-masked]> 
 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/header.jpg> 
Issue 240 - 26th March, 2007 	Go to our website Here
<http://www.fathersonline.org/> 	 
 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/inthisissue.jpg>
*	Hello Warwick
*	Grandads
*	Laughter
*	Single Dads 
*	Special Feature
*	Thought of the Week
*	All You Need is Love
*	News & Info
*	Dad's Prayer
*	Help Us

Hello Warwick

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/man%20shouting.j
pg>  

Words are powerful. Our destiny is controlled by our words and so are
our relationships. If we sow words of negativity, complaining and
ridicule, we reap a harvest of the same. Paul Lewis says, 'A father's
words are like a thermostat that sets the temperature in the house.'

A father's words are very powerful and potent for a number of reasons.
Firstly, because he is a man. Secondly, being a father pushes you up a
notch because you are the creator of a child. The same goes for a
mother, by the way, but I would argue that Paul Lewis is right and that
a father's words can do more good and harm that a mother's words. Let me
give you one simple explanation as to why I think this is true.

Some of you might know that I am involved in music and TV production and
I have a musical background. I love to study the science of sound. Much
of the study of sound and they way we hear has a lot more to do with
psychology than pure science. 

Every person on earth hears differently, but one thing is very clear: if
you want to give a message authority, pump up the bass frequencies. Who
do you suppose pumps out the most bass frequencies amongst the genders?
You guessed it, the male of the species. So even though women are
purported to talk more than men and could well be better at using
language, a father's words carry more authority and can therefore affect
the atmosphere more quickly.

I might be noted that in the study of Quantum Theory and the power of
word and thought, there are a range of experiments that show both word
and thought can affect the future, but I will talk about this in another
article.

The bible, one of the oldest wisdom books in the world says, 'As a man
thinks, so he is.' Another wise figure said, 'You will have whatever you
say.'

So when I received the enclosed Special Feature from Matthew, one of our
readers, his words and his story really hit me hard.

Matthew's father died of prostrate cancer on 4th March 07, a matter of
only 4 weeks ago. Matthew stayed overnight with his father in the
hospital and helped nurse him for the last five days of his life. More
importantly he wrote a tribute to his father last year which we have
included as the Special Feature.  

What a powerful way to use words for Good.  'Life and Death are in the
power of the tongue'. With our tongue we can bring a blessing or a
curse. That is why it is so important that we use the right words and
stay away from negative words. Dale Carnegie said, 'Don't criticise,
condemn or complain.' The Sermon on the Mount says much the same. Words,
whether spoken or written have enormous power.

<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/dad___kids.jpg> 

The challenge is to direct a blessing with our words to those we love
that will lift their spirits and bring healing to their hearts, 'for
with the measure you deal to others, it will be dealt out to you'. As we
lift others, we lift ourselves.

Please read Matthew's letter to his dad and be inspired to put pen to
paper and even get on the phone or personally face to face, say the same
words of love to those you love and watch what a difference it makes.

Lovework

This week is all about you using your bass frequencies to share the
message of your heart with those that you love.

Write out a tribute and message of thanksgiving for your father and
mother. You need to spell it out. You need to tell them. If you can't do
it for your mum or dad, do it for your wife. If you can't do it for your
wife, do it for your children.  Better still, do it for all of them, but
most of all do it with words.

Yours for the power of words

Warwick Marsh

PS Please write a tribute or thank you letter to one or all of your
loved ones this week and then be good enough to share your story with
the readers of fathersonline. Your inspiration might start a revolution.
Your revolution might change the world. How exciting!

 ___________________________________________________________ 

Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 31 years. He is the father
of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 26 years
to 14 years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public
speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself.

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Grandads

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/couple%20talking
.jpg> 

While I don't minimise the vital 
role played by a mother,

I believe a successful family begins
with her husband.

 James Dobson

 

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Laughter

 

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Mouse%20button.j
pg> 

 

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Missionary%20jok
e.jpg> 

 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/F1%20help.jpg> 

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Single Dads 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/DIDS_V2_01.jpg>
Dear Warwick,

                       It is with much sadness that I write to inform
you that dads in distress Inc will be forced to close its doors and
disconnect its emergency 1300 number come July unless adequate
operational funding can be secured. Our current funding under the
'Stronger Families Strategy' culminates in July and we have been told
that there is no funding available to us under that dept again.The group
has been operating with limited funding over the past 7 years through
the help of big hearted men including yourself. Unfortunately we have
lost a lot of good men who had great expertise but put simply 'had to
eat'. These men have given hours and hours of their free time in order
to help those less fortunate then themselves. We will be forever
grateful to those that have donated their time and energy to the plight
of fatherlessness in this country.

Unfortunately there comes a time of realisation. We just cannot continue
as we have been. The demand for our services is ever increasing and we
are unable to adequately meet the needs of the increase. Dads in
distress has 50 groups operating nationally, engages anywhere between
400-500 men on a weekly basis, has a website exceeding 5 million hits
annually, runs a 1300 number manned by volunteers 24/7, trains around 50
facilitators yearly in suicide intervention and group work, operates a
drop in centre at Coffs Harbour, provides free counselling and referrals
to those in need. We have become a community, a community of dads just
seeking a fair go, a community of dads who simply want to continue their
relationship with their children after divorce or separation.

This community unfortunately is about to be shattered.

It seems this Government is unable to find the box that we fit in when
it comes to funding. We are not the only ones. The successful and proven
Community based peer support model that we run saves the Government
millions of dollars a year through the support offered by hundreds of
volunteers nationally.We have even be offered to take the model overseas
to several countries,(maybe we can secure funding from overseas). We
have applied for funding under the National Suicide Prevention Strategy
unsuccessfully. We are still awaiting DGR status and seem to hitting a
brick wall when asking Government to adequately fund us. Sad isn't it
when the Government announced in the 2005 budget $75.7 million dollars
for the DV campaign yet near nothing is given to the plight of men
suffering the same.

Mensline is funded at $2.8 million dollars a year and rightly so, but
Mensline and many funded agencies including the CSA refer men to us. We
do the face to face work and battle to be funded. If we had just 1 tenth
of Mensline's funding we could continue. Unfortunately no ones
listening......Tony Miller dids

Email: [email-masked] 

1.      why we do it (the need)

Separation, Divorce and Male Suicide 

1.1.   Australian and International research and studies into male
suicide point to is a significant connection between male suicides and
relationship breakdowns, including divorce and separation

1.2.   Some 42% of first marriages end in divorce. The AIFS indicates
that in 1994 men were most likely to divorce between the ages of 30-49
years. 

1.3.   Australian research indicates that divorce is rated as one of the
most distressing life events for men and women.

1.4.   Children and mothers have traditionally been the focus of
research on well-being after divorce, whereas only limited attention has
been paid to the distress of fathers following divorce (Stone, 2001).

1.5.   According to Australian suicide researchers Dr Chris Cantor and
Dr Pierre Baume, men are most vulnerable in the period immediately after
separation. 

1.6.   At the Men's Health Conference in 2001, it was suggested by the
then assistant director of the Federal Men & Family Relationships'
program, that one separated man commits suicide each day (Orkin 2001).

1.7.   Research by Cantor on suicides in QLD over 1990?2, shows that
separated men are 6 times more likely to suicide than married men, and
this was greatest in the age group up to 29 years. Separated males aged
30-54 are 12 times more likely to suicide than separated women. (Cantor
& Slater 1995).

1.8.   The QLD Health Suicide Research Project is a study of some 2600
suicides in QLD for 1990-95. In a sub-group (n=294) that reported on
relationship separation and length of time, 73% of suicides occurred
within one month of the relationship change.

1.9.   A study of 4000 suicides by Griffith University found that 70% of
adult male suicides were caused by relationship breakdowns. Research has
also found that separated men have a suicide rate about 6.2 times that
of married men, and about 12 times that of separated women.

1.10. Divorce multiplies men's suicide risk, making them nearly 9.7
times likelier than women to commit suicide even after controlling for
other risk factors, according to a study by Augustine Kposowa, a
University of California at Riverside sociologist 2003
<http://www.search.com/reference/Kposowa> .

1.11. Relationship breakdown is a major trigger for male suicide,
exacerbated by men's experiences with the family law system. This
conclusion was supported by a study involving 15,000 Australians,
released this week by the Australian Institute for Suicide Research and
Prevention at Griffith University, which found relationship breakdown to
be the main cause of suicide, with the male risk four times that of
females.

1.12. Twice as many divorced men kill themselves, compared to single and
married ones.

1.13. Recent research into male suicide in this age group revealed that
males in the 'separation phase' of a marriage break-up were most at risk
of suicide, compared with widowed or divorced males... Relationship
breakdown is a significant characteristic of male suicide in the 24-39
age bracket. The anxiety and emotional pain of separation and divorce
appear to effect men differently. LifeForce, Wesley Mission 2001 

1.14. 'There is a concern that men are less likely to use mental health
services,' Links says. 'Men don't reach out for help or don't feel
existing services meet their specific needs. This might be a factor for
the significantly higher number of male suicides compared to the number
for women.'

1.15. The Federal Government is proposing to spend $2 million over the
next three years on suicide prevention for men aged 25 to 44 - a
pittance compared to the $31 million spent in the 1990s on youth
suicide. 

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Special Feature

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Father-son-w.jpg
> 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

My father died last Sunday 4/3/07 of prostate cancer aged 69. I helped
nurse him in last 5 days of his life, staying overnight in hospital with
him one night. The pain and agony he suffered must have been
excruciating. 

I am writing this article for 2 reasons. 

The first is to urge all men to get themselves regularly checked for
prostate cancer (my Dad's cancer was only detected 18 months before his
death).

The second is that we all should take the time to write a tribute to our
parents. Don't leave it too long!! Mine took 2 weeks from the time I
heard the idea until I put pen to paper because I had to let go of a lot
of past hurts. I hope the following encourages others to act now on both
fronts.

A TRIBUTE TO YOU DAD

18/12/06

This will probably come as a surprise to you, it will probably seem
disjointed and you will probably need help reading it. But know this for
certain, every word of it comes from my heart.

The first thing I want to say is that I love you so much!! I might not
always show it, but I do. I am sorry for all the things I did wrong as a
son and I wish that things could have been different, but maybe if they
had, God wouldn't have moulded us in to the men of God we are today.

Thank you for taking me to all the cricket matches and all the BMX races
I raced when I was younger.

Thank you for taking us fishing and swimming to the beaches in WA. Thank
you for the great holidays you gave us growing up in WA.

I will always remember your corny jokes, your gardening and mechanical
skills, your famous rock cakes, watching The Bill, and your Boney M and
Nana Maskouri albums.

Your love for general knowledge is something that you have passed on to
me and for that I am thankful.

You are a fantastic grandfather to Jasmine, Joshua, Keona, Iolana,
Callum and Myah. The kids love you very much and admire your strength
and courage through battling your illness.

I am glad that we made amends and put the past behind us before you
found out that you had cancer. I enjoy giving you great big hugs each
time I see you!!

There are a lot of memories that come to my mind of the time that we
spent together:

Christmas's and New Years, Picnic's and BBQ's, Watching basketball on TV
together, Listening to your 'When I was a boy..' and Army (i.e. climbing
Mt Royal) and police stories.

Thank you for staying married and riding through the storms that
marriage brings.

It?s easy for me to be critical of you as a father, but as time has
passed and I too have found out how difficult that role of being a
father/provider/lover is, my respect and admiration for you has grown
immensely. I know that you didn't have the best of upbringings and that
as a father you did the best with what you knew how to. For that I am
very grateful!!

As I finish writing this tribute to you I am sure that I have left out
thank yous and other things that I wanted to say, memories that I wanted
to revisit and many more words of appreciation.

I thank God for the time we had together as father and son. I thank you
for moulding me into the man I am today. I hate seeing you in pain and
suffering and wish I could do more. I love you with every part of my
soul and always will.

You are a great dad in my eyes and I'm thankful to God that he gave you
to me as a father.

Love your eldest son

Matthew xxxx00000

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Thought of the Week

 
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/father%20son_gol
f.jpg> 

Kind words heal and help,

cutting words wound and maim.

Proverbs 15:4

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

All You Need is Love

  

RUTGERS TIPS FOR MARRIAGE
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/kids%20marriage.
jpg> 

Kane County Chronicle (Chicago suburb)

Feb 26, 2007 

With half of all first marriages ending in divorce, is there anything
that makes a difference in creating a successful, lasting marriage? Or,
is marriage an old-fashioned, out-of-date idea?

Rutgers University found that marriage relationships can remain alive
and well if couples do the following:

Make marriage a top priority. Married people generally are healthier,

wealthier, happier, and live longer.

Learn and practice relationship skills. Marriage education classes can

help prepare couples for both dating relationships and marriage.

Education makes a difference. People with more education are more likely
to marry and less likely to divorce.

Sexual activity can add stress to relationships. The majority of teens

who are sexually active say they regret it and wish that they had
waited. Avoid sexually transmitted infections, teen pregnancy, and HIV
by waiting until you are older and/or married.

Teenage marriages are more likely to fail. Teens are two to three times
more likely to get divorced than people in their 20s or older.

Children are easier after marriage, later in life. Teen mothers are
likely to live in poverty and never finish high school. Having a child
before marriage can bring problems for both men and women. Children of
unwed parents face greater risks for depression, mental illness, crime,
poverty, substance abuse, school drop out, teen pregnancy, and suicide.

Know the person you plan to marry well. The length of time that you have
known each other, as well as similar backgrounds, goals, personalities,
beliefs and values increase the likelihood of success in marriage.

Refrain from living together outside of marriage. Living together before
marriage is linked to a less-satisfying marriage and a higher divorce
risk. Contrary to popular belief, it is not likely to strengthen
marriage or prevent future divorce.

Strengthen your relationship with a trusted adult. Those who share their
life and concerns with a caring adult have fewer problems. Whether it's
a parent, relative, pastor or teacher, find an adult who is a positive
role model.

Take a premarital course with your partner before marriage. These
courses can help you have a satisfying marriage and see how well-matched
you are as a couple.

Written by Patti Faughn, a family living educator for University of

Illinois Extension  Kane County.

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

News & Info

 

USA Men's / Fatherhood  Speaker Coming to Australia   April 2007

Robert Lewis is the creator and presenter of Men's Fraternity, a three
year men's training resource, guiding men on the journey to noble
authentic manhood. Robert Lewis is fast becoming one of the most
recognized voices in America on men's issues and is an amazing
communicator and teacher in the advancement and promotion of men
discovering their manhood.

Robert Lewis is coming to Australia in April 2007 to provide training,
inspiration and resources for pastors, leaders and anyone passionate
about this vital cause. 

I have three website links for you to go to for more information:

http://www.crsonline.com.au/crs_s_GroupInformation.asp?sgID=17
<http://www.crsonline.com.au/crs_s_GroupInformation.asp?sgID=17>   

- for registration, venue and seminar/training information.

http://www.crsforums.info/mensfraternity/
<http://www.crsforums.info/mensfraternity/>      

- for information on Robert Lewis, Men's Fraternity and all the
available resources.

http://www.crsonline.com.au/crs_r_cat_Search.asp?catID=21
<http://www.crsonline.com.au/crs_r_cat_Search.asp?catID=21>   

all the various Men's Fraternity and Robert Lewis resources that are
available.

If you believe in this cause that Robert is coming to speak to
Australian and New Zealand about, please spread the word and pass his
information around to your interested contacts. I believe there is a
strong movement in our countries at this time towards empowering men and
raising the bar of manhood in our communities, families and Churches.
Please join us in promoting this exciting training opportunity. 

Please feel free to contact me. I look forward in assisting you in
anyway possible.

Let me know what you need as we are only 2 weeks away from Robert
coming. Thank you!

Tim  Smith

Ph: 03 5241 3288 

Fax: 03 5241 3290  

Mob: 0438 551 616

Email: [email-masked] <mailto:[email-masked]>    

Web: www.crsonline.com.au <http://www.crsonline.com.au/>  

__________________________________________________________

Staying Healthy
<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/Prostate%20treat
ment.jpg> 

and Living Longer for the Ones You Love

Prostate cancer is the most common cancer in Australian men after skin
cancer, and the second highest cause of male cancer deaths.

Every year in Australia 2700 men die of prostate cancer ? equivalent to
the number of women who die from breast cancer annually.

Around 12,000 new cases of prostate cancer are diagnosed in Australian
men every year, but many cases do not develop into terminal cases of
cancer.

It is important to note that prostate cancer is potentially curable if
detected and treated while still confined to the prostate gland.

Early detection can be achieved with PSA (Prostate Specific Antigen)
blood test or DRE (Digital Rectal Examination) testing.

While prostate cancer is generally uncommon in men under the age of 50
years, younger men with a history of prostate cancer in their family can
be more susceptible than those without a family history of cancer.

A brochure is available with further information at:

http://www.prostate.org.au/BAM-DL.htm
<http://www.prostate.org.au/BAM-DL.htm>    to help you better understand
the prostate and prostate cancer, and to help you decide whether you
want a test to see if you have an early prostate cancer that may benefit
from treatment. An early test can be performed on men who have no
symptoms of prostate cancer. Its aim is to find this cancer at an early,
potentially curable stage. This is called a screening test. 

What is complicated with prostate cancer is that some cancers grow very
slowly and don't threaten life, whilst others grow more rapidly and do.

Medical experts and researchers are currently trying to distinguish the
cancers that are a threat to a patient from those that are not. 

It is as a result of this dilemma that we believe that you should take
an active role in deciding whether you want to be tested for prostate
cancer. It is your choice.

www.prostate.org.au <http://www.prostate.org.au/>  

 _______________________________________________________

Letters

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

Thanks to all who are producing this newsletter. 

It continues to be a source of great inspiration.

Regards Rick

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

I stopped receiving your excellent newsletter due to some unknown
technical glitch. Could you please put me back on the list?

God Bless

Mike

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Dad's Prayer

 

<http://www.bosweb.com.au/content/EB3TemplateImages/771/father_Mother_ba
by.jpg> 

Dear God

Help me bless others

as you bless your creation.

Help me speak works of 
encouragement to my loved ones

as you speak words of encouragement 
to those you love.

Help me change the world one 
word at a time,

starting with the words that I
speak and write.

Help me write a tribute letter 

to those who are dearest to me.

back to top 

 <http://www.bosweb.com.au/email_blast/templates/fathers/banner.jpg> 

Help Us

Click here for more information about us
<http://www.ausheart.com.au/fathers/about/index.html>  

Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. 
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source
of harm. 

The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence  in
fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible,
involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their
children and their children's mother.

If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation
Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund 
(Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax
deductibility)
Westpac Branch Wollongong
BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558 

Or mail cheque and address details to:
PO Box 440
WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund  is a public fund listed on the
Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the
Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.

You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have
subscribed, or you have been subscribed by a friend.  If you do not wish
to receive future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below or
send an email to [email-masked] <mailto:[email-masked]>
with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject heading.

back to top 

	Click Here to Unsubscribe
<http://emailblast.bosweb.com.au/bwEMailBlast/optout/?CampaignID=1415&Co
ntactID=90915>